The Shadow Proves the Sunshine

DISCLAIMER: This is an old, morbid post break-up bitterness induced "story". I don't even know why I'm putting this up. Just reminded me of how silly I could be at times! :P

“The truth is,
you could slit my throat
And with my one last gasping breath
I'd apologize for bleeding on your shirt”
~ You’re So Last Summer, Taking Back Sunday

Silhouetted and hunched over one of the park benches is an all-too-familiar masculine form.

I move towards it slowly for everything seems to progress at a leisurely pace. It grows in size as I get closer - but why is it even here? At times it seems to be eclipsed by a seemingly surreal haze, but a blurred outline is apparent. The form seems to shine, even amidst the thick darkness that obscures my vision. I am close enough now to infer its tangibility; so it can’t be a hallucination.
The haze is almost gone as I cautiously approach the form in its midst.

Suddenly, it shatters, melting into the evening, and I still can’t believe who it is. I close my eyes and open them again with a disenchanted sigh that is immediately suppressed. I walk over to him and park myself beside his bench. He tilts back his head and looks me in the eye, and I am submerged within the murky brown seas of his eyes.

“Alex.” I utter, stupidly.

“Maya.” He says, the look in his eyes softening.
An arm’s length away from him and his warmth, I stand. Before I can stop myself, I am reaching out. I still don’t believe he is really here. My fingertips brush his face – it has a definite feel, its own rough, beautiful texture.
A light, a presence- testing me out, seeking my measure.

I am about to withdraw my hand when he grasps it within his own and pulls me close to him so we were one being now. The light within me pulses strongly once more before it immediately implodes.

It collapses and cascades around me in a storm of dazzling white fire.

“Maya, I still love you, a whole lot. Be mine again, and I promise you that we will be what we used to be minus the pain.” He’s saying.
His arms tighten their grip around my bare waist. I knew wearing a crop top would be a bad idea.

Suddenly, my senses return and I feel alive again, although the darkness and the emptiness remains. The feel of life has rushed into me. It is a sudden, explosive awakening, something I have never known. For months since he had left me I was nothing but an awareness, and then, in one infinite moment I am everything I want to be.
I am aware but that is not to say that I am conscious.

I can form no thought.

I don’t know my name or even that I might possess one.

For a time, a moment or an eternity, I know nothing. No memories haunt me.

There is only Alex, Maya and the pulse of the dark.

I was briefly aware that his lips were brushing mine, and I’m having my very first kiss.

There’s an odd feeling in my stomach. Not the butterfly feeling he used to give me all those months back in July, but a weird sort of energy, like something is flowing out of it and rippling around me. He is loosening his grip around my waist now, and as I reach out to hold him again, I notice something that could only have been a figment of my imagination. Sure, it was my first kiss- but I didn't know it was my last one.

My eyes widen in horror.

I finally manage to absorb the sight of the knife protruding from my stomach. The pain is imperceptible at first but ever more as the flow of blood goes unchecked.
In death too, I am happy – for the last thing I see is Alex’s smile.